Wednesday, December 29, 2010

Merriest Christmas (thus far)

Let me start by saying that it is awesome to have my soldier home. Even if it is for only a couple of weeks, the time has been awesome. He will be leaving this weekend. Prayers for him and our family would be greatly appreciated. He will not be returning until mid April. This will be a trying time for everyone involved.

But anyways, back to the original reason for this post.. Christmas. I hope and pray everyone had as wonderful Christmas as we did. We are blessed in so many, many ways. And we have far more than we could ever deserve.

What an amazing Christmas season this has been! It was wonderful to have Joseph visit Santa and try to tell him what he wanted for Christmas. Yes, we are a Santa believing family. I know this is controversial for many other Christian families, but we believe regardless. I don't think Joseph will suffer any permanent damage because of this.

If you asked Joseph on Christmas Eve who was coming he would proudly exclaim, "SANTA!" We made a big deal about hanging up his empty stocking, leaving cookies and milk for Santa and carrots for the reindeer. If you asked Joseph, Santa would be arriving to our house on a train.

Then came Christmas morning. It was amazing to see this little boy's light up in joy and amazement at all of the colorfully wrapped gifts under the tree. He was most excited about his Lightning McQueen toddler bike. The first thing he did was rip off the bow and climb on. He's still a tab small but he should fit perfect by this summer.

Joseph hit the proverbial toy jackpot. On top of his bike he also received (just to name a few): kitchen set with play dishes, food and shopping cart, lots of cars, monster trucks, a golf set, a parking lot for his cars with a 3 level parking garage, police station with lots of police vehicles, Toy Story 1 & 2 for blue ray, and Toy Story 3 dvd, special carrying case for his cars, puzzles, books, finger paints, bathtub colors and bubbles, and several other dvds. I know I've forgotten some of the toys, so if I didn't name the toy you got for him don't think it's unappreciated. He also received new socks, jammies, outer wear, and a really awesome handmade, crocheted scarf, mitten, and hat set that just makes him look so awesome.

Joseph is thoroughly enjoying all of his new toys. It's especially cute when he cooks something on his stove for us and then brings it to us to "eat". Of course I packed up much of his older toys that he had grown (to be put away for the next child) but I still might need to pack up some more stuff. His room is exploding. It's so awesome to see him playing with all these new toys though. And he did fantastic opening all of his gifts too. In the beginning not only did he want to open his gifts but everyone else's too. Towards the end of the Christmas get togethers it took a little coaxing to get him to open things.

I definitely enjoy this different side of Christmas. I really love seeing the excitement and joy on his face. It's amazing being his Mom.

But before I close, I should say "Santa" was good to me too. I got lots of awesome gifts and many frivolous things that I wouldn't have purchased for myself. I hope everyone had a great Christmas as well.

Wednesday, December 15, 2010

All I Want for Christmas..

Okay, so seriously, who doesn't want to end this phrase with, "my two front teeth"?

Christmas is nearly here. For the masses it's a time of consumption and overspending. It's a time of stress and racking up credit card debt. But, I got to thinking this morning, what do I really want for Christmas?

Putting the stereotypical "selfless" answers aside, ya know the ones: World peace, end of world hunger, end of the recession, etc. And putting aside the comical ones: Two front teeth, hippopotamus, etc.

As a Christian I know the "reason" for the season. I know that this is a time to celebrate the birth of my Savior. I know that it's not about gifts, or debt. I know it's not about food, or gluttony. I know it's about Jesus. We celebrate this day, first and foremost, to honor the time when our Lord came to Earth as a little, helpless baby. I know that, I do.

Although I know that, I still have the greed that most people do at Christmas time. An overpowering feeling that I deserve some of my wants during this holiday season. I mean after all it's Christmas right? Why shouldn't I have what I want? Geez, I am selfish.

Ask me what I want for Christmas and you'll hear one of two answers. Either you'll get a list of things I'd like to own that I don't already have. Or perhaps you'll get what has been my standard answer of late: a baby. Truly, honestly, if I could have one thing for Christmas (and luckily I don't have to list my soldier in there, because he will be home for Christmas) it would be another child.

If you've paid attention to this blog, or my other blog (link on the right), you'll know we've been trying, albeit unsuccessfully to expand our family. Truly if I could have a Christmas wish or miracle, it would be for another bundle of joy. That's it. Truly. I have baby on the brain.

And while I'm talking about it, let me say this. Those of you who say, "just stop thinking about it and it'll happen," have never, ever been in my shoes or anything close to my shoes. Do you know who says that? People who put forth minute effort in order to have their children. People who got pregnant on the first try or people who are parents to "oops" babies. No one who has ever suffered with difficulty conceiving would ever offer this up as advice. Because anyone who's been in my shoes knows that is not how it works. It's an absolute impossibility to not think/worry/ponder/fret/hope/dream about becoming pregnant when it seems so far out of your reach. But I digress..

..The point is this, had you asked me before today what I wanted for Christmas, yeah, I would have said, BABY!!!! And as I thought about this more this morning I got to wondering, when the hell did I get to be so selfish? I've always felt that I was a pretty unselfish person. But here I am, sitting in my warm apartment, eating my delicious breakfast, after just waking up from my bed, and I'm picking up clutter from my busy toddler (the same toddler that I dreamed, and wept, and desired 3 years ago - the one I longed for during the Christmas of 2007 - the same one that I conceived around that same Christmas of 2007), puttering around in my pajamas because I have the privilege of being able to be a homemaker and stay at home mom, and it just about smacked me over the head. For crying out loud! How could I be so greedy?

I am greedy. It's pure and simple. Greed is defined as "excessive or rapacious desire, esp. for wealth or power." I do have an excessive and rapacious desire for another child. I have this feeling that it is my right to have another child. I'm so desperate to have more than I have, and more than so many other people have that I've forgotten about what I do have.

I remember that Christmas of 2007. I was so broken, and so sad. I spent so much time earnestly praying for a child. I spent so much time weeping on the altar at church, begging, pleading for a child. And here I am three years later, and I have that precious, perfect, amazing child. But still I'm not satisfied.

I've long wondered why we, oh so deserving a family, haven't been gifted another child yet. I'm sick (literally) to my stomach over the people I've seen conceive lately. I'm so tired of hearing of teens, drug addicts, alcoholics, irresponsible, and unstable women conceiving children. I'm so tired of hearing about the children who are conceived unintentionally and then are vacuumed or burned out of their mother's wombs at abortion clinics around the world. I have this self righteous attitude that somehow I'm more deserving to have another child. I recognize this pride, this greed, this selfishness and I have to squash it before it completely envelops and consumes me.

I want another child. I want another pregnancy. I want a sibling for Joseph. I want to give my husband another baby. I want all those things. I do. But, I need to be grateful and appreciative for what I have. I have a healthy, beautiful, imaginative, brilliant little boy. He has rearranged my life in such a way that I don't know which way is up some days, but it's the most amazing, happy, loving experience of my life.

So, I'm not saying that I don't still want another child. I truly do. I'm not saying that I want to stop trying for another baby. We will continue to try. I'm not saying that I'm willing to accept the possibility of only having this one child. I will down the road seek out medical help if we continue to be unsuccessful. But, what I am saying is this: I am happy. I am satisfied. I am blessed. I have abundantly more than I deserve. I have everything right now that I need. My husband will be home for Christmas. I have a good man that strives to take care of his family. I am a stay at home mommy to the most precious little boy in the world. So, to answer the original question, "All I want for Christmas is..", everything I already have. There's nothing more I need in this world right now than what I already have.

Saturday, December 4, 2010

Am I Living it Right?

Let me start by saying this, I trust God completely. I know He's faithful. I know He provides. But, I'm a pessimistic, doubtful human. Sometimes I wonder this exactly, 'Am I living it right?' Are we following God's path, His plan? Are we where we are supposed to be? Are we on the right course? This song and has summed up my feelings to a T. Please take a minute to listen and read the lyrics.



I'm sure I'm just feeling pessimistic with Jeremiah leaving. Don't take this wrong. I am proud and happy that my husband is serving our country. I am aware and accepting of the sacrifices that we've experienced and will continue to experience throughout this military career. In all honesty I believe these hardships and difficulties have aided in forming the person I am today. I am a better wife and a better mother, and I think too, a better sister, daughter, and friend.

I guess it's only natural to doubt things once in a while. I really think God has steered us to this career path. I really believe God's hand is in this. It's just hard to sometimes remember that during the sad/hard moments. But I guess these feelings of doubt keep us all on our toes. That way we don't get too comfortable and end up NOT 'living it right.'

Jeremiah and I both seem to find a song during each of these absences that is our anthem, or motivator or just a soundtrack to the current situation. I think this John Mayer song is mine for this duration.

Tuesday, November 23, 2010

Blessed

I am writing this now, because I know the next several days will be hectic and if I don't take the time today I may not get a chance to do this before Thanksgiving.

Let me start by saying I am blessed. I serve a God that loves me and is faithful and never fails to provide. God has blessed our family with so much. We have so much to be thankful for. But, just because I feel God has blessed us does not mean that we are more special or important than anyone else. God's blessing are not reserved for certain people. God blesses all of his children. It's your prerogative or perspective that lets you see it as a blessing or something you provided for yourself. I'm not dense enough to believe that my life is the way it is because I tried really hard or worked really hard. I see God's handiwork in our life on a daily basis. Some people are so blinded by their own selfish ideals to see that perhaps something a little bigger than themselves is responsible for certain situations or circumstances.

I am thankful for my God. He loves me. He loves my family. His hand is always in our lives. None of my problems, worries, stresses or ever too big for him. He is faithful and ever present. There is no doubt in my mind that He is who I should be thankful to for all the blessings and happiness I have in my life.

I am blessed to have a good, hard working husband. He is a man that does all that he can to provide for our family. He works double shifts at least twice a month to continue to support our family. He is a good father, and he is the love of my life.

I am blessed to have the most magnificent son. I am in awe of him everyday. He is constantly learning and growing. I am thankful that his difficult time in the womb and first week of life has not negatively affected him in any way. He is a brilliant, loving, affectionate child. I couldn't be happier with this child that we have been given.

I am blessed to have so many awesome friends. Those friends who are there when I need them. Those friends that recognize that I need them near me even if I don't ask them to be. I am thankful for unconditional friendships. Friends that allow me to be me and love me just the same.

I am thankful for my family (both blood and those through marriage). I appreciate the love, support, and guidance they provide.

There are so many other things to be thankful for. Too many to list. So, I'll close with this: I am thankful for the life I have been blessed with. I am blessed to live the life I do. All parts of it. I know I don't deserve everything that has been bestowed upon me, but I am grateful none the less.

Saturday, November 20, 2010

Is it December yet?

I am frazzled. I am stressed. I am stretched and wore thin. This month has brought some major issues and tenuous situations. I'm about ready for November to be over. Bring on December.

To start with, everything is just a little bit stressful as we prepare for Jeremiah's departure. It's hard getting everything arranged and taken care of for an absence that will span so many months.

He'll be home at Christmas and New Year's, but will miss my birthday for the second year in a row. It's sad, and disappointing. My favorite place to go for my birthday is Benihana. Normally my folks take me there to celebrate my birthday, but with my Dad on disability for his back there's not quite so much money this year. So, I guess I will take Joseph and myself to dinner there on my birthday. Hopefully he'll be home next year for my birthday.

We've encountered some unforeseen and large expenses this month as well. So, it's stretches an already overstretched and thin budget to just about the snapping point. I know things will be a little easier once we start getting the military paycheck again, but that's still about a month away.

I'm also a sad over the dissolution of two good friend's marriage. It's hard to see this happen to two people that I love so much. Their divorce was just final after a long separation. I'm glad to see them moving on, but I'm still sad about the entire situation.

We've been trying to have another baby since Jeremiah's return. This month was really our last chance to "try" until his return in April. It didn't happen, and much to my sadness and disappointment there will not be a new baby in 2011 like we were hoping for. If I'm being completely honest I'm quite shattered about this. After the miscarriage in 2009 I just thought we would have an easier time getting pregnant. I'm frustrated and sad, and feeling discouraged. Once I know for sure that our tricare benefits are back in proper order I am going to go to the OB/GYN and get checked out. It's possible that my PCOS has gotten worse and I may need some medication to help with proper ovulation. Many women with PCOS need medication to get pregnant. My doctor said my fertility was extremely high after I conceived with Joseph because it only took 11 cycles and I was un-medicated. Many women with PCOS can struggle for years to conceive. I know we haven't tried 11 cycles yet, but I am just feeling a little nervous about this. I think getting a check up will ease my mind about this and hopefully give me some reassurance that I can and will conceive, eventually.

There are so many other issues and problems and stress besides these few things. Life is just hard right now. I've tried to scale back as much as I can of my extra responsibilities. I'm hoping that will give me some time to buff myself up emotionally and mentally. I've been so scatter brained lately because of all this extra stress. I'm just ready for a break.

I know it could be worse. I know God won't give me more than I can handle. I hope that's true, but I don't know how much more I can take at this point in time.

Monday, November 15, 2010

Preparing to Say Goodbye for Nearly 1/2 a Year

I am the proud wife of a brave American soldier. I love the titles, "Military Spouse" and "Army Wife." I believe there's a lot to be proud of with my husband's chosen career path. I've got to say that I'm also quite a sucker for the uniform. What woman doesn't love a man in uniform?

I am excited and nervous to see what this career path will bring to our lives. It will be amazing to see where this takes our family, and all the wonderful opportunities that we will be provided with.

With all that said, I'm not a big fan of the absences. It's easier than I thought it would be. That's probably because I know this is good for our family, and that it is putting us on a path to achieving some of our goals. I know what he's doing is important for his family and for his country.

The hardest part about the absences (other than obviously the fact that he's not here) is getting used to being a single parent. It's hard to get into the swing of taking care of everything by yourself. I've found that the transition for me takes about 2 weeks. After that I'm usually in full swing, have all my balls up in the air, and can get more accomplished than I ever imagined.

This absence we are currently preparing for will be the longest one we've had to ensure. My husband will be leaving in a little over 2 weeks and he will be gone for a little more than 5 months. We will be able to communicate with him more often than we have in previous training stints. That in itself should make things a little bit easier.

I just ask for prayer for our family as we start this new leg of God's journey for us. There will be a lot of adjustments we all will need to make and it will I'm sure be a difficult journey. I mean we are talking about the absence of a husband and father for nearly 1/2 the year. So, please pray for strength and endurance. Please pray that this brings our family even closer together, and that we all emerge stronger and even mightier people because of it.

I know I can be strong and do what needs to be done. I know it's all for the greater good. I know I have a few people to help out if need be. I have a really hard time asking for help because I don't want to burden anyone. So, I'm grateful for those people who extend their love and support without me asking them to.

Thank you to everyone who has supported us through these military endeavors. Your love and support has not gone unnoticed. preparation

Saturday, November 13, 2010

The Fake Friend

Let's just start off by saying that I am too old for people with elementary or high school school mentality. I think everyone knows at least one of those people. It's the same person, who while you are in grade school all of a sudden starts liking the same boy you like (although they showed no interest before). It's the person who runs out and gets the same shoes, coat, barbie, or haircut because it's what you have. It's the same person who all of a sudden wants to be someone's friend because they see you are attempting a friendship with a new person. It's the "if I get it first, I'm better than them" mentality. Whatever of those 3 forms you may know this person as, any way you cut it, they are not a "real" friend. As someone who has survived this type of relationship, honestly, it doesn't get better with age, people honestly have the tendency to get even nastier with this behavior.

So, let's talk about the obvious. I'm not a kid anymore, and I realize that I can have a friend that is friends with many other people and it in no way shape or form threatens my relationship with them. Some people don't feel that, and feel to have a friend they must be their one and only friend. It's a possessive, "gimme, gimme me" mentality that is extremely dangerous.

My husband (although he sometimes doesn't notice these things, has picked up on this situation as well) and I are seeing one unfold currently. We have a front row seat at times to the two-faced, underhanded tactics of this type of person.

I'm probably confusing a lot of you. So let me break it down and tell you my dilemna. There is someone who up until recently hasn't been much more than an acquaintance to me. I knew this person through my husband, but although we knew each other we didn't really talk too much. Over a short period of time I feel like we've become friends and I've found that I really like this person.

So, now that I've begun talking with and getting to know this person someone else has taken notice of this and as far as I can tell is trying to drive this person closer to themselves (I believe at hopes of making me "lose" this person as a friend). It's the only thing that makes sense. Here, this is getting confusing. We will give these people pretend names to protect their identities. So, we have "Amy" who I've been talking to more and am finding is a pretty cool person. Then we have "Drusilla" who is not friends with me, and up until when I've begun talking to "Amy" hasn't been "Amy's" friend either.

The part of this that's so disheartening, the part that really worries and bothers me is "Amy" getting hurt. I am an adult and I know that "Drusilla" will not be able to "steal" my new friend away. At one point I knew "Drusilla" and at the time I didn't really know "Amy." The things that "Drusilla" would say about "Amy" bordered on violent. The vulgar, grotesque things that were vomited from "Drusilla's" mouth about "Amy" could make your stomach wretch. So, now that I see all of a sudden how this person who was so hated is now an interest to "Drusilla," I'm a little worried about poor "Amy."

Maybe "Drusilla" is trying to be a big girl and trying to make amends, build bridges, etc. But I'm skeptical at best. The way it's unfolded looks more like, "I don't like her (referring to me), so if I can take away what she likes, I win."

Fortunately I'm a big girl, and I understand true friendships and relationships don't work that way. So, I'm not worried about that aspect. What concerns me is this: Should I inform "Amy" of "Drusilla's" true or at least fairly recent comments/feelings about her, or do I just let the situation unfold and "Amy" find out for herself?

I guess I know the answer to this. I'm an adult and I'm not going to instigate "drama" which is all that would really happen. I'll keep my mouth shut.

I just think it's silly for people to behave in such a two-faced way. I think it's silly for people who are not satisfied in their lives to see someone who is happy and satisfied and to take it upon themselves to upset that balance. What this person doesn't understand is that someone who is happy/satisfied and has what she wants out of life is not thrown off course by their jealous, petty behavior.

I am happy, satisfied, pleased, content with my life and my relationships, and no amount of envious, back-stabbing-esque behavior will change that. I just hope that this person (Drusilla) is able to find the happiness and satisfaction that I have from life so maybe she can stop misusing people and finally put away her "Fake Friend" cape.

Monday, November 1, 2010

Best Halloween Ever!

Our little "Calvin" did so well last night. This is technically his third Halloween but this is really the first one he could do "trick or treating."

I've been trying to build up this day for him. Talking to him about what exactly will be happening. I'd been practicing the phrase, "trick or treat" with him for weeks. All the little guy could say was "treats" but that's okay. I'm pretty sure he got his point across.

I thought for sure he would want to be carried some of the way since there was so much walking involved, but he proved me wrong. He didn't want to be carried until we finished the last house and were walking back to the car.

He got a pretty good haul considering how few lights were actually on. I'm a little sad because I worry that trick or treating may be obsolete by the time he has children. It looks like so few people actually participate in it anymore.

This was probably my favorite and best Halloween ever. Despite invitations to go trick or treating with other people we decided to keep it a family affair. It was a multi faceted reason. First and foremost, Daddy missed Halloween last year, and with his career in the military there's no guarantee he'll be home next Halloween. So, it was very important for me to be sure that both Joseph and Daddy had a real, big, deep memory of yesterday's events. In the two previous Halloween's we've bounced around trying to make it to every Halloween day event or trick or treating we were invited to. I think that really takes the focus off my child's special experience. I would really like to see Miles and Joseph trick or treat sometimes though, so maybe we'll join them every other year or so.

We've also made it a priority for both sets of grandparents and family to see Joseph dressed up on Halloween. I think this will be the last year for that as well. Maybe we will get him ready a little earlier and give the grandparents an opportunity to come to our home for pictures before we start out trick or treating. But, I don't think we will drive to and from each house next Halloween. It cuts down on Joseph's trick or treating time, and takes away some of the magic of the night.

I'm sure at least one person won't like our new Halloween rules, but I need to put my foot down. Every other holiday is consumed with splitting time, and driving to different places. I really want a holiday to make our own family traditions. I have to put my family first and not worry about what other people want.

I hope everyone had as great a Halloween as we did!

Monday, October 25, 2010

Mini 'Sharing My Frugality' Update!

I just thought that I would let everyone know about my Target shopping trip from yesterday. I love sharing my 'deals' and hope that someone else can benefit from them.

First of all, I was super excited because we needed shampoo, and I needed some hairspray and hair mousse. I was expecting to spend at least $12 for all 3 things because I didn't have any coupons and I didn't see any of these products on clearance. Then I stumbled upon a great display of Herbal Essences products. They had the huge bottle of shampoo (that are normally $5.04) coupled with a full size hair product (that are usually $2.99) for the low price of $5.42! I love this! The giant bottles of shampoo are double the volume of the smaller so it's a great savings since the normal size ones are $2.99. I was able to find a huge shampoo coupled with a hairspray and then another huge shampoo coupled with a hair mousse. So I spent $10.84 and basically got all of this: 1 hairspray ($2.99), 1 hair mousse (($2.99), the equivalent of more than 4 bottles of shampoo (normally each $2.99, so that's a total of $11.96). All of this should have cost me, $17.94, but it only cost me $10.84. That's a savings of $7.10 (nearly 40%) just for buying it all at once instead of separately!

My other awesome deal was with those, 'buy this and that and receive a $5 gift card.' I really hit the jackpot with these yesterday.

They had cat litter on sale. Usually I spend $12.19 for a huge container of Tidy Cats. They had Tidy Cats on sale for $10.99, plus if I bought 2 I received a $5 gift card. It should have cost me, $24.38, but between the sale and factoring in the discount for the $5 gift card it's like I only paid, $16.98. That's a savings of $7.40 or approximately more than 30%.

Next they had cat food on sale as well. I usually pay $11.99 for a 16lb bag of Purina Cat Chow. They had it on sale for $10.99 and if I bought 2 I got a $5 gift card. It should have cost me, $23.98, but between the sale and factoring in the discount for the $5 gift card it's like I only paid, $16.98. That's a savings of $7 or about 30%.

Next they had my Always on sale. I usually spend $6.99 on one package. They had them on sale for $6.89 and if I bought 2 I received a $5 gift card. It should have cost me, $13.98, but between the sale and factoring in the discount for the $5 gift card it's like I only paid, $8.78. That's a savings of $5.20 or about 37%.

Last but not least, I needed body wash. I usually buy whatever body wash is cheapest. I don't like to pay more than 16 cents an ounce (and normally 16 cents an ounce is what I end up paying). So that means I usually end up buying Suave unless I have a coupon. They had Dial body wash on sale. Normally the Dial body wash is $4.29 a bottle. They had it on sale for $3.99 and if I purchased 3 I would receive a $5 gift card. I picked out two 21 ounce bottles and one 24 ounce bottle. Before the savings it should have cost $12.87, but between the sale and factoring in the discount for the $5 gift card it's like I only paid, $6.97. That's a savings of $5.90 or about 46%. Plus it breaks down to 10 cents an ounce!

Saturday, October 23, 2010

Sharing My Frugality

With how tight money is for so many people, I thought I would try and share some of my money saving tips.

First of all, we don't have cable in the Aberlich household. We never have, and probably never will. We watch too much tv as it is with the few free channels we get. So, we definitely do not need extra channels.

If you can get by without internet there's a big savings too. We have spent more of our married life without internet than with. We currently have it but we started having it on a regular basis as a way to stay in contact with Jeremiah and his commanders after he enlisted. Comcast and WOW! charge WAY too much for internet. My suggestion is to check into AT&T. Yes, our internet isn't the fastest speed in the world, but it is more than fast enough for Facebook, blogging, email, and all the minutia we use it for. The best part about AT&T is the price. We only pay $19.95 a month for our wireless DSL. And for those wondering, no, it is not an introductory price. But honestly, if you can get by without it, save the money. But, if you really need it (which is kind of how I feel now) than go the cheapest route. It's all the same internet. So, why pay more to access it?

Keep in mind these tips are for those really trying to cut costs. If you have the money for all these extravagances then YAY! for you, but we really don't. And we are so accustomed to trying to cut costs I don't know how much these things would change even if we did have the extra money.

Another service we don't use is Netflix or Blockbuster online. That's not to say we haven't tried free memberships, but we honestly don't use it enough to even justify the cheapest plans they offer. My suggestion for renting movies is the local library, Family Video, or the Redbox. If you can find it at the library it's usually free as long as you return it on time. Family Video is far cheaper than Blockbuster, and if you are going during the week they have a rent a new release get an older movie free. Plus, Family Video offers free children's movies. The Redbox is good because they allow you to get new releases for a buck. That sure beats Blockbusters over $5 new release rentals. And if you spend money on video game rentals, keep in mind some libraries also loan video games for no cost. I know for a fact that ours does.

This next one isn't for everyone. I am blessed to be able to stay home full time. Since Joseph isn't in school we are fortunate enough to get by using one vehicle. That means a savings of a car payment, car maintenance, and car insurance. I usually run my errands in the evening or on my husband's days off. It takes some getting used to and every once in a while a little juggling, but this has really saved us a lot of money. Some people just assume we can't afford to have two vehicles, but honestly it was a choice we spent a lot of time thinking about and it's worked out pretty well for us. Now, that will change when Jeremiah leaves for his next training because he'll be taking one of our vehicles (yes, we have two even though we only use one) to Georgia with him. So, of course we will have both vehicles on the road (one in Michigan and one in Georgia). But, that will more than likely only be temporary while he completes his next phase of training.

Kudos to you if you use cloth diapers! Cloth diapers just aren't for me. I know they offer an amazing amount of savings, but since we live in an apartment I don't have a washer and dryer at my beck and call. In addition to that, I really like the convenience of the disposable diaper. So, for those of you who use disposable diapers I have found (through trial, error, and leaks) that the cheapest brand you can count on is Luvs. I've tried multiple store brands, and also Pampers and Huggies. And it's my opinion that Luvs provides the least amount of leaks. So many store brands I tried just leaked like crazy. Don't get me wrong, Pampers and Huggies are great too, but I believe Luvs are just as good and they're half (at least) of the price. The only store brand diaper I was ever impressed with was Kirkland brand. I'm not sure if that's Sam's Club or Costco. Someone had given them to us. So, I don't really know the cost ratio on them. But, after using Huggies and then using Kirkland, I am completely covinced that Huggies makes Kirkland. Yes, there's a Kangaroo instead of Mickey Mouse, but seriously it looks, feels, smells, and is made the same way. So, I'm certain Huggies dispenses these under the Kirkland name.

Anyways, back to the Luvs. I've recently found the cheapest way to purchase diapers is through Amazon. They offer the big three (Pampers, Luvs, and Huggies). If you set up to have them delivered automatically (and you can change the frequency of the deliveries all the time) and sign up for their free Mom's Club, you will save 30% off of their price for diapers. I believe their diapers are approximately the same price as buying them in a retail store. So, imagine getting your diapers for 30% off retail. Oh, and don't worry about shipping. If you sign up for the Mom's Club and the automatic delivery there is no shipping cost. Also keep your eyes out in your email and also when you're flipping through your magazines. Amazon is constantly sending me coupons for 10-20% off my diapers. And yes you can use those coupons on top of your already 30% of savings. I just ordered a box a few days ago and got 60% off. Plus, (at least for Luvs) Amazon carries a box with more diapers than I can purchase at the store.

As far as wipes go, I still purchase them in the store. After using multiple brands, scents, and thicknesses, I've found my favorite wipes are Target store brand wipes. They are much cheaper than the big names and work just as well. I think they may even be a little softer than the Pampers and Huggies.

In the Aberlich house we have "dumb" phones. Our phones cannot connect to the internet or do anything fancy. Our phones can make calls and text which is really all we need. I don't want to pay for internet on my phone when I already have internet at home. This means that our phone bill (which is for 2 cellphones) ranges from $67-71 a month. I know people that spend more than that on one phone every month.

I also save a lot of money on grocery shopping. When we were first married I would go "major" grocery shopping and spend several hundred dollars every few weeks. I don't do that anymore. What I do is this: At the beginning of each week I look at the ad for the grocery store and get an idea of what's on sale. Then I take an index card and write down the days of the week and what meals I want to have on each day. (Be sure to have a least one day in there for your leftovers). I take into account what I already have in the house and then I go through each meal and write down only what I will need to still get to complete that meal. Then I make my shopping list for what I will need for that week. I find this helps me to not overspend and also not get food that winds up going bad. So, yes I go shopping every week but I'm seriously saving more than 1/2 of what I used to spend on groceries.

I'm an avid Target shopper. I always have been and always will be. The only problem I've had with Target is that they are notorious for their items ringing up incorrectly at checkout. If it's on sale just be sure to make them change the price. If the item is not on sale but is marked for let's say, $1.99 and it rings up for $2.49 be sure to go to the customer service desk after checkout and ask for the Michigan Scan Law. In Michigan if this happens they have to credit you back the difference to the original price (so they give you your 50 cents back) then they have to give you 10 times the difference (in this case 50 cents) up to $5. So, in this case 50 cents times ten is $5. So, you paid $2.49 for the product but they have to give you $5.50 back (50 cents for the difference and then the $5 scan law). Which if you give this any thought means you just got paid $3.01 to take that product home with you. Like I said Target is notorious for this, so just keep your eyes open during checkout.

Target's clearance is also awesome. Some places clearance things out that are damaged, but that's not how Target's clearance works. There is nothing wrong with the products they are discounting. It usually means that product is discontinued, or they just got a new version (one with newer packaging). You can get awesome deals on shampoo, baby products, pet products, etc. Just be sure to check the end caps when you go. I don't mind paying 75% less for my shampoo just because the bottle is a little bit different than the new one. Seriously, check it out.

Another one of my favorite things from Target is there 'buy this and that and get a $5 gift card'. I've seen them do this on diapers, wipes, formula, paper towel, shampoos (large bottles), toilet paper, cat litter and cat food. Let me give you an example, the other day they had these packages of my shave gel. I usually pay $1.97 for one bottle of my shave gel. They had a package with 3 of my shave gels (same size, brand, scent) for $5 (buying those 3 bottles seperately would have cost $5.91). If I bought 3 of these packages (a total of 9 shave gels) they would give you a $5 gift card. It worked out to nearly an $8 savings compared to if I had bought them one at a time. So, of course I got them to save my $8, and now I won't need shave gel for a long time. This can really work out to your advantage. Just keep your eyes open and be willing to stock up to save some major money.

My last piece of advice is to get a credit card that offers cash back rewards without an annual fee. The one I use is a Chase Freedom Mastercard. If you are consistent and careful you can use the card for all of your purchases, pay off the balance when you get the bill (so, no interest) and then reap the benefits of cash back. Our card gives us 5% on most things. Which if I use it for groceries, gas, necessities works out to a $20 reward check every couple of months. What I do to be sure I have enough money to pay the balance when the bill comes is this: Say I go to Target and spent 43.97 on some necessities (TP, shampoo, wipes, cat food, etc.) even though I didn't use my debit card, I write it in my checkbook register -- Pay to Mastercard (Target) debit $43.97. So, I've already allotted for that money so I'll be sure I have it to pay the bill when it comes. So I just do that with all the purchases and then send in check to pay the full bill when it comes.

Last but not least, if you feel like you couldn't keep up with my last bit of advice, at least choose a debit card that provides benefits. Most banks offer at least one debit card with rewards for free (they offer tons with an annual fee too). Add the rewards to your card, you might as well be earning something for spending your money.

I hope that my advice can help your family save some money!

Tuesday, October 19, 2010

Minutia of October

I noticed it's been nearly two weeks since I blogged. I don't really have a specific topic in mind so I guess we'll just see where this goes.

We went to a friend's wedding a couple of weeks back. It was nice to see some people we haven't seen in a while. I got a little tipsy trying to keep up with a girl that weighs less than 1/2 of what I do. She won.

It was a beautiful ceremony and reception. They were blessed with a 70 degree plus day for an outside wedding in October on the water. It was amazing. Probably the best wedding we've ever been to.

A couple days before the event we went to a BBQ with some of the same friends from the wedding. Joseph attended the BBQ with us. It was really cool to see JJ introducing his son to so many people he went to school with. He was so happy and proud to show off this little person he helped create.

It was really awesome for me to get compliments on Joseph. So many people seemed to love him. I loved having the chance to revel in his awesomeness to people who had never met him before. I even had someone come up and tell me he was the cutest baby/toddler they had every seen.

But other than the wedding not a whole lot has gone on in the Aberlich household. Jeremiah's still trying to find full-time work, I'm still trying to pinch pennies and stretch us to the next paycheck, and Joseph is, well, awesome as usual.

Oh, my Dad did have back surgery last week. He has since been released from the hospital. It will be a several month long recovery, but he's doing as well as can be expected. For those who pray, please keep his recovery in your prayers.

Hmmm... What else?

We did take Joseph to Greenfield Village/Henry Ford Museum to see the trains. Thank God for the gift of memberships to museums. There's no way we would have been able to afford to take him right now otherwise. Joseph loved it. His eyes literally lit up. That child has never been more excited about anything. It was an awesome thing for Mommy and Daddy to experience with him. He's such a special kid.

I got to go to a Right to Life benefit dinner with my Mother - In - Law last week too. It was nice to spend some quality time with her. It was at the Sterling Inn. The food was pretty good. The speaker was the man who had taken the picture of the baby reaching out of his mother's womb while the doctor was performing in utero surgery to correct spina bifida. I'm sure a lot of you have seen this picture. But if you haven't please check it out. Here's the link: http://www.michaelclancy.com/ It's an amazing photo. I had a nice time at the dinner. But overall I do think it's sad that there even has to be a benefit dinner to help stop the killing of innocent children. It's ridiculous that abortion is an acceptable thing in today's society. I am happy to do whatever I can to help protect these young children and give them the rights that all human beings deserve to have.

As someone who is actively trying to add to our family it absolutely disgusts me that women everyday all over the world are killing their unborn children. I would like nothing more than to be carrying a child in my womb, and some women are purposefully killing them. It just doesn't make sense to me.

Moving on..

I would just like to say that I think at some point people need to put childish things away and stop lying. You can't always lie about things because you are afraid of how people will react to them. There is a couple different ongoing situations with people in our lives who are actively lying while trying to hide things. All I can say is that we aren't that naive, and eventually bridges will be burned. Stand up people. Be adults. At some point or another it's time to drop the pretenses and just tell the truth. I'm so tired of two-sided conflicting stories. I mean at least if you want to lie about something ongoing in your life perhaps you should make sure everyone has their stories straight.

Friday, October 8, 2010

To My Blog Readers

I just wanted to write a little note to say thanks to everyone who checks out, comments on, and shares my blog. I'm glad that I write things that interest you and that you're curious about.

I'm writing this to commemorate over 500 hits on this blog. I reached that number back a couple of entries ago, but just haven't had a chance to write about it.

It's really exciting to know that my blog has been read that many times. It's awesome to see that people are interested in what I have to say. I know 500 is not a lot to some people, but to me, it seems huge!

So, thanks again for everyone that checks out my blog. I'll keep writing, so please keep reading.

Saturday, October 2, 2010

Alleviating Some Anxiety

I'm not really sure why, but right now I have a lot of anxiety. I think it's from a build up of emotions and feelings from the last few days. It's not even one thing in particular that's set it off. It's a culmination of a lot of different things. Let's see if I can jot some of this down, get it off my brain, and relieve some of this pressure from my chest.

First of all, we have a special event coming up this month. It's a special day for someone Jeremiah went to school with. It's something we've been looking forward to ever since we received details of the event. I, however, have reservations about going. The person who ended a friendship with me over this summer will more than likely be there. I have absolutely no interest whatsoever in crossing paths with this person. Part of me would like to just sit this event out, especially considering that this person is more JJ's friend that mine, but I know JJ really wants me to go. I have no interest in any drama or any nonsense detracting from this couple's special day. I hope I'm wrong, but I have a feeling that is going to happen. I am an overly sensitive person, and I am not wanting anymore drama in my life than what is absolutely necessary. I've done my best to eliminate as much as I can, and I do not want to purposefully bring it upon myself. I just don't want to agonize over this situation anymore.

Next topic..

I wish I could do more for my sister. She is so amazing and I'm so proud of her. I wish JJ and I have more resources to help make her life easier and less stressful. She's an amazing young woman and is going to make a fabulous doctor one day. I just wish I could do more for her. She's awesome and deserves so much more than she gets.

..And continuing..

I'm a little overwhelmed about our finances. I know we've been in tough spots before. I just hate when you put everything down on paper and you can't even imagine how it's all going to work out. I know everything will. God has not ever let us down. I need to have more faith. I need to trust more. It's just so hard sometimes not knowing how things will work out.

I believe I'm a pretty frugal person. I've done my best to cut our finances down to the bare minimum. I click coupons. I shop for things when they're on sale. I am doing my best to pinch pennies and stretch our meager means. We don't live extravagantly. I know this is only a tough spot on the road of life and things will get smoother once again. It's just so hard being in such a vulnerable position. I know God knows our needs and will take care of us.

This subject is a little tougher..

It just sucks finding out that people who you think you really know are not even close to who you thought they were.

Moving along..

I must say in all certainty that I have no mercy for people who are unfaithful to their spouse. I am talking about inappropriate emotional and/or physical relationships. I think it's a selfish, cowardly, low down thing to do. I think it shows total disrespect for everyone involved, and magnifies the "cheater's" own self centered, egotistical delusions about themselves. Here's the simple truth: If you love someone and you find that you are no longer satisfied with them and the "grass is looking greener on the other side," address it with the person you are committed to. If nothing can be done to make the relationship you are in a happier more satisfying place to be, then end it. Be an adult and show some respect. Don't drag other people through your sleazy, selfish garbage. And here's a indicator for you, if at anytime you have to lie, cover up, withhold details from your spouse about another person, more than likely that person shouldn't even be in your life. You cannot carry on a successful relationship with someone who constantly has their hand in someone else's cookie jar.

..(sigh)..

If you are in a relationship with someone you care about, that person should never ask, expect, or desire you to lie or withhold the truth about your relationship. Anyone that asks you to hide your love or relationship is not ready to be in a relationship and probably does not care for you in the slightest. Only half of that couple will ever be happy or satisfied, and I can promise you it isn't the person who wants to share their relationship with the world.

Next..

I must admit that I am a little nervous and apprehensive for JJ's next bit of training. It will be 16 weeks which is the longest training stint so far. I'm looking forward to him completing it and it hopefully helping him find a stable, full time, long term career, but I'm not looking forward to the separation. But as the song goes, "you can't really smile until you've shed some tears." So, we'll do it. We'll make it through. I'm just not looking forward to it. As it still stands he may be leaving in December but that isn't 100% for sure yet. If not in December then more than likely January.

Last but certainly not least..

As much as I want it, and as much as I'm looking forward to it, I am really nervous to be pregnant again. No, this isn't my pregnancy announcement. I'm just looking ahead.

I had such a difficult time carrying Joseph. I just hope that God blesses us with a little bit smoother, healthier pregnancy. I think stress really played a big part in everything going so badly with Joseph. I am doing my best to deal with my stress better (blogging seems to help), and I won't be working and spending so much time on my feet. So, I think it'll be better. I really hope so.

Well, I am feeling a little better. I think I may be able to actually get some sleep now.

Sunday, September 26, 2010

Jamie Lynn

Friday the 24th of September would have been my little sister Jamie's 24th birthday. She passed away just a couple months after turning two years old. I am two years older than her. And although God has blessed me with another fantastic little sister, I still miss Jamie.

I was less than 3 weeks away from turning 5 when she died. Fortunately, I was old enough to have plenty of awesome memories of her, and our time together. I'm glad that I was old enough to remember her. I miss her though. I wish she could have been born healthy, and that we could have grown up together.

These are a few of my memories of her. I remember that when she would cry, I could sing her ANY song and she would stop crying and look over at me. That's all it took. I remember she had a turtle that played music that she loved more than anything. I remember how much dark, curly hair that she had. She had the darker complexion from the Native American blood in her. She was beautiful, and fascinating. I didn't understand much about what was happening to her when it was going on. All I knew is that she had to take a lot of medicines, we spent a lot of time taking her to the doctors. I also remember when her body started failing having to spend some time at a hospital that I remember being far from the house (although, I don't think it really was). I remember after that time at the hospital when she came home, she wouldn't stop crying even when I sang to her, and her turtle didn't make her happy anymore either. I never wondered why my little brother who was a year and a half older than her could do so many more things than she could. All I knew was that she was my baby sister, and I loved her dearly.

She was born with a genetic disorder that affected her chromosomes. She actually was born with an extra part of one chromosome. Something that sounds so minor, but really isn't. Her body just didn't know how to function with that extra genetic material. When she passed away the December after her second birthday she wasn't developed much more than an infant that was 6 months old.

I still remember the day she passed away. I remember waking up and knowing it was very early because it was still dark outside. But, even though it was very early there was a lot of noise in the house. When I got out of bed I found that there was lots of grown ups I didn't recognize in the house. I found my mom sitting at the kitchen table, and I climbed into her lap. I asked her why these people were at our house, and she told me it was because Jamie had died in her sleep. Our family lost a several close loved ones right around this same time, so I knew what died meant. I didn't really believe it though. She told me I could go see her if I wanted because she was still in her crib. I went into her bedroom, and sure enough she was lying in her crib. She looked like she did when she was sleeping. I remember sticking my hand through the slats on the crib and touching her arm to try and wake her up. When this didn't work I remember trying to jiggle her a little bit. I guess in my mind I just thought that maybe the grown ups hadn't tried really hard to wake her up. So, I tried my best to jiggle and rouse her from this obviously deep slumber.

The next thing I remember was a little boy, and a little girl standing on either side of me at the crib. As I continued to wake Jamie up I remember them quietly telling me that she wasn't going to wake up and that she wasn't really here anymore. I didn't know who these kids were. They were unfamiliar and were not anyone I had met before. I figured they must have come with one of the grown ups that were at our house. They annoyed me though, I mean, she was my sister, how did they know anything about her? I remember resting my face on her crib and looking at her sleeping so peacefully. The two children stayed close to me, and after a minute or two I left the room.

As an adult I can understand now that the grownups there were a mix of EMT's, someone from the coroners office, police, and I believe Jamie's pediatrician. I was discussing details of Jamie's passing with my mother one day, and I asked her about the children. I was curious of who's children they were. I mean, I knew an EMT wouldn't have brought their kids with them. She was confused and didn't know what kids I was talking about. I described them and explained to her what happened. She assured me that other than me, Jamie, and Chris (my brother who was less than 3) there were no other children in the house at the time of this happening.

I know they must have been angels sent to help me understand the situation. There's no other reasonable explanation.

She was a great little sister though. I only wish we would have had more time together. I miss her, but I know one day we'll be reunited.

Wednesday, September 22, 2010

Some of My Favorite Things

Happiness from the week thus far (in no particular order):

  • Joseph asking to be "wocked" (rocked) the night before last when he wasn't feeling well. It's been a long time since that little boy let me rock him.
  • My husband making me one of my favorite dinners: shrimp with feta and penne.
  • Joseph asking me for a hug. This was the first time he's ever done this. Granted he was feeling under the weather, but I'll take the affection any way I can get it.
  • "Pwaying" (playing) with Joseph. Even though when he asks me to play it usually means he will give me a toy only to snatch it back 3 or 4 seconds later with a loud, enthusiastic, and proprietary, "MINE!!!"
  • Finding out that my blog has nearly 500 hits since I started last spring. In fact his blog entry should put it over.
  • Joseph going potty twice on the big toilet.
  • The dozens of things my husband does to make my life easier. A few of which are: washing the dishes, putting Joseph to bed, cleaning up cat throw up, cleaning up an exploded diaper, working to support our family, and letting me nap undisturbed (for the most part).
This doesn't capture all the blessed moments of my life this week, but it's a few of my favorites.

Tuesday, September 14, 2010

Daddy's Pinning

This past weekend was Jeremiah's formal Pinning Ceremony to recognize his promotion in the military. Although he was officially sworn in and commissioned a few days after returning from OCS last month, this past weekend was the special ceremony for extended family and such to attend.

We had to be on base Friday evening because Jeremiah had to be there for practice on Saturday morning. Anyone who's had children knows that 2 1/2 hours of driving with a toddler is a complete crap shoot. Fortunately it went well. There were only minor issues when his "choo-choo" was dropped.

We arrived Friday night and stayed until Sunday afternoon. Joseph loved all the humvees and huge trucks scattered throughout the base. He would say "hi" and "bye" to the trucks or as he calls them "ucks" every time we drove by. Then if he hadn't seen enough trucks he would emphatically declare, "more ucks!" He had a good time. I think he was a little confused by the fact that all the men were dressed just like his Daddy. There were a couple of instances when he was looking for Jeremiah and was lost in a sea of camo, and just couldn't find the right guy. I think overall he had a good time. Joseph and I were able to spend time with another Army wife and kids while her husband and Jeremiah were at their "practice."

Speaking of this other family.. They have 3 beautiful children. Ages are: 5, 3, and 7 months. The five year old was potty trained at two, the three year old was potty trained at 18 months, and the 7 month old was, believe it or not, partially potty trained. This tiny little baby would hold his bladder and be placed on the toilet and then pee. His diapers would be mostly dry because he would wait to go on the toilet. It was pretty interesting that this baby already could do this.

The ceremony was really special and moving. My in laws were able to make it to the ceremony, and it was nice to share this with them. My father in law (who was in the service during Vietnam) actually gave Jeremiah his first salute. Joseph and I placed his new rank insignia on his uniform. It was a really fun weekend. And Joseph and I are super proud of our 2LT!

Monday, September 13, 2010

Silly Indecision

So, as most of you know I created http://tryingtocatchtheegg.blogspot.com/ as a place for me to blog about my journey of getting pregnant. I originally was allowing everyone to access and then scaled it back to only include people I selected. I have returned it to it's original settings where everyone can access it. I wanted it to be a place not only where I could write and vent about what was happening, but also as a place that other women who are ttc can come to and know that they aren't alone on their ttc journeys. I've placed my blog address on some of the ttc sites I frequent and those women can't access it unless I change the settings. So, I'm opening it back up.

Again, this will still be a normal blog, and the other will be all about ttc. Trying to Catch the Egg will contain tmi for most of you, so if you're squeamish stay put here and I'll continue to blog about normal topics. Thanks for everyone's support and interest in our newest endeavor.

Friday, September 10, 2010

About 'Trying to Catch the Egg'

I have decided to reign in the accessibility of that blog. At least, I think I did. I am not the best with these silly websites. If you would like to be on the accepted viewers list of the new blog please comment to this blog or send me a message on facebook. Keep in mind this blog will still be my normal blogging place.

I don't have a problem with anyone that I am friends with on facebook reading it, but due to it's subject matter I want to be aware of who has access to the information posted on it. After looking at the statistics of this blog, I'm pretty sure that there are a few people looking at this blog that aren't necessarily people that should have such detailed information about the Aberlich's.

I'm an open book for those interested in knowing about me, but again due to past situations, and also due to the subject matter I think I need to be aware of who is able to access it. Thanks to everyone who has an interest in my life, and/or what I write.

New Blog, Visit at Your Own Risk

Just putting a blog on here to let everyone know that I have started a ttc blog. Here is the address: http://tryingtocatchtheegg.blogspot.com/ I will continue to blog on here with regular topics but this other blog will be devoted to my journey to getting pregnant. Keep in mind this new blog may contain TMI. So visit at your own risk, otherwise keep checking back here at grumpybearlair for normal less graphic topics.

Monday, September 6, 2010

Moving On

A lot of thought has been given to a tough situation over the last few days. I recently had to get into contact with the person with whom I had a friendship end during JJ's absence (during OCS). The person currently has some borrowed items belonging to us, and I trying to be the bigger person, contacted the person to see about having the items returned. Accusations were brought up by this person over what caused the deterioration of the relationship. I've thought about this situation a lot. I've prayed about it a lot. But, I always circle around to the same answer, I shouldn't mourn the loss of this relationship. Especially since they didn't care enough about me to even address me when they wanted the relationship over, especially considering what was already going on in my life.

I didn't want a confrontation. I didn't want to hear (read) blame or excuses for something that happened nearly 3 months ago. I just want this chapter of my life closed. That's all there is to it. If these were legitimate accusations they would have been brought up immediately. Not nearly a quarter year later. It just seems like grasping at straws to alleviate the guilt over the situation.

JJ asked me if I missed this person. It's not a hard question to answer. Yes, I do miss this person. It's hard not to after opening yourself and life up so much to one person. So, yeah, I miss them. That doesn't change anything. There's been moments when I wanted this person's opinion, or wanted to share something with them, but it still doesn't change the fact. If I can't count on this person during life's challenges, if they can't be with me through the bad, why do I want them around for the good?

I mean even in a marriage you have to take the bad with the good. Marriages aren't all candy and roses. Marriages are filled with hardships, struggles, issues. As are most relationships. Yeah, some crappy things happened during my relationship with this person, but the main reason I didn't end things, is because of the big picture. Yeah crappy things happen in every relationship, it's the sticking them out and continuing to love and be there for each other even when you're at your worst that matters. I don't have time for people in my life who are just going to walk out when the going gets tough. That's what happened here. Crappy things happen in all relationships. All of them: marriages, parental/children, siblings, friends, etc. Nothing is perfect. No relationship is perfect. That's why I didn't end my relationship with her when she did crappy things. I mean, sure some of the things said and done were not good in the slightest, but regardless of it, she was still my friend. I loved her anyway. I believed in the "this too shall pass" mentality and that anything going wrong was just a hiccup or a bump in the road.

I don't have room in my life for abandonment though. I've got enough baggage already from being abandoned, and it's not something I choose to allow in my life. You want to walk out of our relationship? That's fine, but don't expect to be allowed back into my circle of trust. I will forgive, but I always will learn that you cannot be depended on, counted on, or trusted. I will not come crawling back and asking for things to be as they once were. I have no reason to be bound to you. You aren't my husband, you aren't my child, I have no reason to carry about this wish that everything could be fixed.

No one likes failing at things. I guess that's part of the problem. I hate that this relationship was a failure, and I wish things could've been done to prevent it from being so. It's in my nature to want to fix things, and make them better. As an adult, I have to recognize this isn't plausible. I need to close the door on this. I didn't run away from this, I didn't close the door, I wasn't given a choice in this matter. I will live with the consequences of this persons actions and learn from it. That's all I can do.

For the sake of keeping the peace we'll probably always be acquaintances. Mainly because of the circle of friends we both belong to. I'm going to reiterate this though. I don't hate this person. I've never hated this person. I forgive them for what they've done. I just want to move past it. It's over, and done. I need to be able to focus my attention on other things. I wish nothing but the best for them and their family, but I have to focus on those in my life who matter.

I am also not saying that one person has done all the wrong in this situation. I know my blogging about some of the things I was hurt by in the relationship really hurt this person. That wasn't my aim. So, I am sorry for any hurt I've caused them. I never expected someone who cared so little about me to be hurt so much by me writing about past things that had happened. But the person was, and I'm sorry for it.

I'm not a cruel or mean spirited person. I wouldn't purposefully hurt someone. I feel sad that I caused hurt. It was never my intention to cause anyone pain, especially over a situation already excruciating for me. All I can do is move on and move past. That's all I want to do. I don't want this to be an issue, a heartache, a headache, a blog topic, or to cause any more feelings or emotions. It's been nearly 3 months. I want this over and done with. I'm ready to move on and past this. It will be my goal to not have the urge to even blog about this person anymore. I will pray that God heals my heart and helps me to put this behind me and completely move on. I'm so ready.

Thursday, September 2, 2010

Odds and Ends

About 10 days or so ago Joseph went potty on the big toilet for the first time! It was a very exciting time for me. The poor kid probably thought I'd lost it, dancing around and whooping for joy. I'm so proud of this accomplishment. Although we haven't had any more successful moments on the potty yet, I know this is a step in the right direction. I'd love to have him potty trained before another child arrives, but if it doesn't work out that way it's not that big of deal. It would be nice to only have one child in diapers at a time though.

So, as you all know I've been suffering from baby fever for a bit now. The question has been asked of me a few times recently, "When will you be adding to your family?" So, let me put it out there that it is being worked on, and hopefully we will have a new bundle sometime next year. For those waiting patiently for a new Aberlich, keep in mind that it took nearly a year to get pregnant with Joseph. I've mentally prepared myself for it taking that long again. Granted we did get pregnant very easily, and accidentally last summer with the pregnancy that ended in miscarriage, but that may have been a fluke. Rest assured, I am looking forward to having another child, and as soon as we know, you all we know too!

I'm also really happy to say that our marriage is doing really well. For those of you who are married, you know about those ups and downs. I think we're getting to a point where we understand each other a little bit better, and we have much deeper intimacy because of it. So, for those who say the first year of marriage is the hardest, I'd like to say, I think it's more like the first 5 years or so.

Nothing has been set in stone yet about JJ's next training. The earliest he'll be going is in December, but that's only if all of the paperwork gets done before the session is completely booked up. We still have a lot of uncertainty about how we will approach this next training. As we figure things out, we'll keep everyone posted.

My baby sister, who Joseph calls Mimmy, is away at MSU. She started her first classes yesterday. I think she misses home but seems to be enjoying college life so far. JJ, Joseph and I are really, really proud of her. We can't wait to see all that she accomplishes.

This past Monday we took the youth group to Detroit to volunteer at the Capuchin warehouse. I think the teens were able to get a lot from the experience. After we had worked in the warehouse we traveled to the Heidelberg Project (which the girls really liked) and then dined at the Connor Capuchin soup kitchen. The day was filled with humbling experiences.

I also got a chance to go to the Heroes on the Homefront meeting. It was really nice to talk to these ladies. This is going to be awesome getting to know them all more and more and I look forward to them sharing their insight and wisdom on being a military wife.

So, that's about it. Looking forward to a couple of BBQs this weekend, and some much needed friend and family time. I'm also really excited about Jeremiah's formal pinning and commissioning ceremony in about 10 days. He is already a 2ndLT but this is the big hoopla to accompany the big promotion. So proud of him, and so excited to go. Joseph and I will be pinning (attaching his new rank to his uniform) and he will be getting his first salute from his father (who had served in the Army previously).

Saturday, August 21, 2010

Looking Forward..

August has been a great month so far.

Daddy finally came home. We were able to celebrate the 2nd year of Joseph's life with people we love and care for. My parents just celebrated their 25th wedding anniversary. And my baby sister is getting ready to head off to her first year at MSU as a pre-med student. It's been a beautifully busy and chaotic month so far.

We're set to begin the next chapter of our life. Little choices and big decisions have been made, and we're patiently (mostly) waiting to see the next part of our life unfold. We're anxious to see what God has in store for our young, little family.

I know now, more than ever, that God is in control. I feel we're headed on the right path. And I know that he will continue to provide for us even though I can't see the big picture. I don't know why I doubt God when He has been nothing less than faithful to us. But, I'm back on track, and I know all is well. That's not to stay there won't be storm clouds ahead, but I know He'll bring us through those storms. That's the part that really matters.

So, I thought I should share some of the things I am most looking forward to in the hopefully near future.

I am looking forward to adding to our family. I am really hoping that we will be able to give Joseph a baby brother or sister by this time next year. It will be amazing to expand our family.

I am looking forward to Jeremiah completing BOLC and hopefully being able to apply the new knowledge in a new full time, stable, sufficient career (with benefits).

I am hoping we will be able to finally purchase a home, and give Joseph the backyard he deserves.

I know I've said it before, but I will never be able to say it enough: I love my husband and appreciate all that he is doing to provide me with the opportunity to be a homemaker. He is an amazing father and husband. I am so blessed to have him.

So, like I said, I am looking forward with great anticipation to the future. I love where we are in our lives, and our marriage and I am hopeful for what the future will bring.

Monday, August 9, 2010

Happiness

To say that I am happy, would be the understatement of the year. It's been amazing having my husband home the past three days. It's so wonderful to have my other half back. I can honestly say, now that it's over, the OCS absence was far harder than the basic training absence. There were some changes in the variables and I'm sure that contributed. But it's over, and I'm proud of all my husband has accomplished. From here on out any further training absences should be easier because we will be able to have much more contact with him.

So any of you who have heard the story know that when we picked Daddy up for his leave during basic, Joseph was not too happy to see him. He wouldn't go to him. He didn't want Daddy to touch or hold him. He definitely didn't want Daddy to touch me either. So, I was a little nervous that he would respond the same way when we picked JJ up on Friday. JJ's flight was slightly delayed. Joseph was getting a little restless. But, at last we could see Daddy coming from the terminal. I bent down and whispered, "Look Joseph, it's Daddy. You can go get him now." He took off like a little bullet and leaped into Daddy's arms. He was so excited to see him. He kept hugging him saying, "Dadas." Then in the car Joseph was a talking machine. He just couldn't stop telling Daddy about all sorts of things. It was really special. I'm really glad that this homecoming went so much smoother than the last.

It's great having my helpmate back. Joseph and I are getting re-adjusted to having Daddy home. We are all so very happy to have this time together. We know it won't be very long before Daddy has to leave again, but we are blessed to have this time with him. I am so proud of my husband, my brave soldier, for doing so much for us. He's amazing, and I am blessed to be his wife.

Saturday, July 31, 2010

Cleaning Machine

So, those of you who have been to my house now that MOST (not all) of the time I keep a fairly clean and organized house. It doesn't sparkle very often though. I really only do really deep down cleaning every few weeks. I unfortunately don't have the cleaning bug that many women and homemakers seem to have. As long as everything is put away and there isn't a lot of grime I'm happy.

But of course with my husband coming home I am on a mission to make this place sparkle and shine. I want everything to look perfect for when he is home. I did the same thing when he came home during his holiday break from basic training. I got all the dust out of every nook and cranny and did the tedious cleaning chores that normally get overlooked during normal housework.

Last December when he came home, I made the mistake of thinking my house was in fairly good order and waited until the day before he came home to start working on the cleaning. Big mistake. Once I started doing all those little "extra" cleaning chores it was nearly midnight, my house was torn apart from moving things to clean and I was far from being done. So, this time I vowed to give myself a week to get everything done. That way I could take my time, get everything done, and actually sleep the night before he came home. I must admit, although I don't enjoy housework normally, I am really enjoying it right now. I really taking pride in what I'm doing for our family and most importantly my husband. I really wound up with only 6 days since the Youth Group Waterpark trip was yesterday, but I've been a busy bee most of the day. I'm making progress and feeling good. I had made a list of the things I wanted to get done and I'm slowly checking them off. I'm thrilled to have a task to put all this nervous excitement I have about my husband coming home into. All this excitement is sure getting the job done.

So far today: I've cleaned my itty bitty little hallway. Which isn't much I know. But, I dusted and wiped down walls. Cleaned all the windows and blinds in every room. I've scrubbed Joseph's room inside and out and also rearranged his room. The new setup gives him a little more play room I think. While cleaning Joseph's room I went through and packed up some toys, clothes, books and stuffed animals. (I have to get ready for all of the new fun things he's sure to get at his party). I also cleaned out my freezer and scrubbed it until it shined. I did the same thing with the fridge (honestly, if I would of realized how yucky it was in there I would have done it sooner). I also scrubbed my drip pans for my stove. Although those don't really sparkle, they do look much better than they did before. I'm on a roll though.

So, anyways, I should get back to my work while my son is still napping. I just wanted to blog a little because I was feeling so proud and accomplished. We have less than 5 days and 23 hours. (And for those counting that is less than 145 hours.) YAY!!

Thursday, July 29, 2010

Enough is Enough

I am too old to deal with this silliness. Nothing, absolutely NOTHING that I have written about has been a fabrication. That's not to say that I haven't left out some of the more offensive things, but I've told the truth. That being said, I don't want, or need this drama in my life. I have done the best to put this behind me. I haven't said anything online - in blogs or anything for a month. So for her to still be talking about me is just out of line.

My solution is quick and easy. If I catch wind of anymore of her posts about me or blindly stumble across them as I did this week, she will be completely blocked from both mine and Jeremiah's accounts. I have left her on his because I wanted them to work out a way to be mature, adult friends without me in the mix. She is one of a group of his friends that went to highschool together and sometimes hang out together. I didn't want to totally make this decision. But seeing as my husband has left me to keep our family safe and taken care of while he is gone, and this is causing me harm (and when I'm stressed I'm not the best mommy for Joseph) I need to take care of this as I would any other shortfall or obstacle that may arise while he's gone. I need to just be an adult and take care of it. The band-aid fix isn't working, so something more drastic may be needed. If I have to go that far, Jeremiah and I will make the decision when he is home, about whether or not contact with her is best for our family, and whether or no to reinstate it. Like I said, I'm willing to assume this nonsense is over, but if it comes to my attention one more time I will take care of the matter.

It must be nice to live in a world where someone's biggest concern in life is who is following who and such. I fortunately, live in the adult world. I have been doing my best to raise my child and be a single parent for the last 7 weeks, while my husband trains to lead troops of men into a war he may very likely be in the middle of next year. I don't have time to worry about who's on this and who's on that. I will not let this pettiness bring me stress anymore.

If you want to be a part of my life you need show my husband and family a little bit of respect. I can assure you the same goes for Jeremiah. He may be away, but after spending a decade with him, I have a little bit of insight into his morals, values, and expectations from friends.

Wednesday, July 28, 2010

My Life in Fact, Does Not Revolve Around You

So, I don't pretend to be computer saavy. I know bits and pieces that I've picked up from trial and error, but other than that, I'm mostly lost. I still can't load a picture on twitter. I still have trouble navigating some of these social network sites, and the fact that my blog looks as presentable as it does is purely by accident. I am not that good with these sites.

That being said, I am "smart" enough to read facebook statuses, and when I signed on to Jeremiah's facebook to respond to a message someone had sent me about writing to him, I was metaphorically slapped in the face. I saw my ex-best friend's status (because she hasn't deleted JJ from facebook - yet!). Something to the effect of, "I don't understand why someone that hates me is still following my blog and my twitter account." I thought wow, she must've been a jerk to someone else. She really wants to have no friends left. I of course scrolled down to see the comments, all from people that she hasn't stabbed in the back apparently yet, and saw one from her saying something like, "Yeah, but she blocked me from seeing her blog." I'm paraphrasing here. I thought for a minute, could she be talking about me? I mean she took the initiative to delete me on twitter and facebook. Could she be talking about me? So, I flipped over and navigated as best as I could through twitter and my blog. Although I blocked her from my blog, which I thought meant that I would be removed from hers (although apparently social networking sites apparently do not follow common sense), I was in fact not deleted from hers. And although she deleted me from twitter, she was still on mine. I guess I hadn't really given it much thought. She took the intiative to delete me from facebook, I just assumed she has deleted and blocked me from everything. I mean why facebook and not everything else?

So, let me address a couple of things. I do not in fact, hate you. I've been through a lot things in my life, but as I think over all the injustices or wrongs I've been dealt.. I don't know if I hate anyone. I definitely don't hate her. I'm not really sure where she got this impression considering SHE is in fact the one that terminated our relationship. In fact if anyone hates anyone here, it would be her hating me. She was the one who deleted me as I was going through one of the most difficult times in my life. Not me. She abandoned me. She broke the friendship. Just because I blog about some of the more crappier things she's done, it doesn't mean I hate her. Frustrated, yes! Pissed off, well yes of course! Sad that she could turn on me when I was going through a difficult time, yes I am hurt. But hate? No, I don't hate her.

I know it's hard to believe. But my life in fact, does not revolve around her. This hasn't been some elaborate scheme to keep tabs on her or anything. I know it must be hard to believe, but I am trying my best to be a single mom right now while my husband is trained on how to lead a squad of men into a war that he will very likely be in the middle of sometime next year. It was just by chance that I signed on to facebook while her status was up at the top of the page when I went to check the message. If it hadn't been there in my face, I wouldn't have even seen it.

So, that being said, I am going to do my damndest to make sure she is off of all my stuff and I from hers. I will do my best. I have more important things to deal with in my life then her petty nonsense. Another thing she needs to keep in mind though, if she keeps it up, she won't be friends with my husband for very long. I can guarantee you that he will side with the person he is spending his life with. He is already upset enough with how her and her sister have treated me. She is really on thin ice. If she continues to treat me so badly and be so petty, he will not want her in his life either. She has already put me through enough during what was already a tough time, if she keeps it up she'll be down another friend. He's my husband, and I can guarantee he is not going to be okay with one of his so called friends treating me like this. He is my husband, and I can assure anyone reading this that he is going to pick me over someone he went to highschool with.

Tuesday, July 27, 2010

The Final 10

So, here we are, down to 10 days. These 10 days should go by fairly quickly because Joseph and I will be kind of busy this week and then next week I will being doing all sorts of little things to get ready for JJ's return. I'm relieved that we're coming to the close of OCS. He only has to get through a week and a half. There were a couple times that he wrote to me and I thought that he might be coming home without finishing, but it looks like that won't be a problem. I know he's learned a lot and is really excited to see how many doors this opens for us.

We had planned on JJ going into military intelligence. It was one of the longer jobs to train for, but we felt that it may have been a safer position, plus it looked like there could be civilian job opportunities on this career path. That door has been closed for us though. At least for right now. They are getting ready to deploy a lot of soldiers in the upcoming year, and therefore are trying to fill all open positions. There are some big decision for us to make. This choice will make or break his military career, this choice will decide how safe of a job he has, this choice will change the paths of our lives in one way or another.

That being said, Jeremiah is not deployable until his training is complete, but he's being told that it is very likely he will be. I know he would like to get the hands on experience but I am nervous about the potential dangers. God will continue to take care of us and direct our paths. I have much more peace about this than I've had in the past. Everything will go according to God's plan. I just wish I knew what His plan was.

I have still been working on my weight loss. July was a tough month, because I've felt pretty crappy through it. When I feel like crap, I eat more crap. Since the surgery, I am slowly starting to feel better. I'm not completely recovered but I am feeling better everyday. I was hoping in the beginning to be down 30lbs by the beginning of August, but that's not going to happen. I am currently down 16lbs. I would be happy just to be down 20lbs by the time Jeremiah is home. I'm working on it, but still recovering. We'll see if it happens. I'm eating much better so that has to count for something. On a good note I weigh less than when I delivered Joseph. The next milestone is to weigh less than I did when I became pregnant with him. I'll get there. I'm doing this for Joseph and any unborn children we have. Every pound I lose increases the chance of a healthier pregnancy and decreases the chance of obesity related health issues later in life. This weight wasn't all put on overnight, and it's not going to come off overnight either. I'm motivated, and I'll get there. Thanks for everyone's support and encouragement on this matter.

On a happy note, I got to see my maid of honor yesterday. She is expecting her first child this fall. She looks great, glowing, and happy. She is nearing the end of her pregnancy, and getting ready for the birth of this new child (the baby's sex will be a surprise). I'm really looking forward to meeting this new bundle and hoping to keep better in touch with her. I know she'll be a fantastic mom.

Tonight I'm going to the kickoff of a small group called Heroes on the Home Front. It is a military family support group. I'm really looking forward to this. It will give me a chance to meet other women going through what I am. It will give Joseph a chance to meet and play with other children too. I'm hoping to develop some new relationships and make some new friends.

Joseph is as amazing as ever. It seems everyday he learns at least one new word. He is getting stronger not just physically but intellectually as well. I'm proud of all the things he's learning. I'm looking forward to his birthday party. It will be a great opportunity to see family and friends. He's also been getting to bed easier for me. I am glad we are finally moving past the problems of him going to bed. He has been waking at 6am which is hard too, but at least he's going to bed in the first place. We'll get back to where we were. I can't forget that Daddy's absence has been difficult on him as well.

Monday, July 19, 2010

My Support System

The last week and a half has been a really tough, trying time for me. I've been frustrated over the situation that came about. I've been upset about having to be hospitalized and have yet another surgery. Having to do all this with Jeremiah's absence has just been icing on the cake (Okay, well not really. That is sarcasm).

I know the cliches that "God won't give you more than you can handle", "The only place to go when your down, is up." I've heard it all. It still didn't change the fact that I was angry about this all happening, and with terrible timing to boot.

Although these last 10 days or so have been hard (in every sense of the word), things are finally starting to get back to normal. Slowly but surely. These moments of doubt, and hardship really make me reflect on how blessed I am. Also, if I've learned anything during these 6 weeks of Jeremiah's absence it would be summed up in this order: I am stronger than I ever thought I could be, jealousy can destroy even the strongest of relationships in the blink of an eye, and hard times really show you who is truly your friend and who isn't.

The outpouring of love, support and help during Jeremiah's OCS time has been overwhelming. I've really learned who matters in my life, and who I matter to. I've also found out who I didn't matter to, and who I didn't have to have in my life. I am thankful for everyone who has touched my life during this challenging time.

I am also extremely grateful for everything that has been done for me and Joseph since I began being sick. The outpouring of love and help has really blessed my heart. I will never be able to appropriately thank those of you who took care of Joseph, who came to see my at the hospital, who brought us meals, and who picked up my slack for commitments I had to break. Thank you to everyone who visited, called, texted, emailed, and facebooked me. Thank you to Dawn and Kimmy for always keeping Joseph first and foremost and making sure he was fed and loved. I can't even begin to thank everyone by name, but know that so many of you have touched my life and my heart, and your kindness and generosity will never be forgotten.

Although I am not anywhere close to being back to my old self, or completely healed, I am on the road to recovery. I know that I have to put Joseph and my health first, before anything else. That's been difficult for me because I hate breaking promises and not following through with things. But, I am trying, because I see the big picture and know what has to be done.

So, thank you again for everyone who has helped in any way. Thank you for everyone's cards, well wishes, and most importantly prayers. I belong to a strong church family, and I am so thankful that I do. I also have the most amazing friends and family that anyone could ever ask for. I only hope that someday I can bring some blessing to your lives measurable to the blessings you have given me.

Tuesday, July 13, 2010

I Miss Those Blue Eyes..

This song really sums up how I'm feeling about my husband being gone. It's really amazing how much I miss this man, and how much I'm in love with him.

I'm a little sad and scared that he can't be with me tomorrow as I go into the hospital. It's so much harder to deal with scary events, tough events without the support and presence of your soul's mate and companion. I miss him so much.

Friday, July 9, 2010

Heartstrings

July has been such a busy month so far. I can't believe we are only 8 days in. There are so many things going on. Graduation parties, church functions, and so many other social commitments. It is good that we're busy though. It helps take my mind from how long my husband has been gone and how long it will be until he gets home.

But that's not what I really want to talk about, what I really want to say is..

I am so blessed to have such an amazing son. I know I've said it so many times, but he truly is a remarkable little boy. He fills my life with such joy and excitement. I want to be the best mom I can be for him, because he deserves the best. He is such a joy and I love him to pieces.

He is growing so quickly. It never ceases to amaze me! He has learned so many things. He has grown so much. He is becoming less and less like a baby and more and more like a young child. He has such personality. He has demands, and wants, and likes and dislikes. He is learning new ways to express himself to the world around him. His imagination is developing. Everyday he is learning new words and stringing together longer and more precious sentences. He loves to tell me about the world around him. What he wants, what he sees, what he doesn't like. It's all so precious and amazing. I love seeing him grow, and as much as I long for him to be my little baby forever, I love seeing this growth, and this progress. He honestly speaks more often and clearer than some children that are older than he is.

I love how he tells me "night" when I put him to bed. I love how when we pray before bed that he tells me who else he wants to pray for.. "Daddy, Mimmy.." It's amazing. Everywhere we go he talks to me about cars. This child is definitely set to grow into a "car guy." He makes me laugh everyday. It's especially funny to see him explaining to the cats about his blocks or dinosaurs. Or even funnier when he wants the cats out of his room and he points at his door and tells them, "Meow, get out" or "Meow, go now." He has a firm belief that everything in this world is blue, and that all birds (including Big Bird) are ducks.

I can't wait for Jeremiah to see all the new and wonderful things our son can say and do. He will be so impressed in all that has happened in two short months. I wish he could be here to experience it first hand, but I know he is doing something bigger for our family, and our country for that matter.

And my husband.. What can I say about him? He is truly a fantastic man. This month will mark 10 years together. One full decade. I still remember our first kiss. I still remember the fireworks that came from just the slightest touch, I remember them clearly, because I still get them when we touch. We've been through so much. We've grown together. We've come so far together. We've been at our highest and lowest points together. We've laughed together, cried together, fought, smiled, and dreamed together. I couldn't imagine my life with anyone different. I'm so glad we never gave in or gave up when things got tough.

He is my supporter. My best friend. My companion, my helpmate. He completes me. My hand fits perfectly in his. His lips fit perfectly to mine. He's my lover, my shoulder, my sounding board. He gives me strength, and always shows me the rational side of things. My soulmate, my Godsend, my supporter, my beloved. He's my husband, the father to my son, and the father of my unborn children.

We've seen each other at our worst and our best. I love him so much more than yesterday, and yet, not as much as I will tomorrow. Our love deepens and matures day after day. There's no other person that I would rather walk hand in hand through the storms of life with. He holds the key to my heart, and his eyes can reach the depths of my soul.

I know God made this man for me. No other person is more suited for me. No other person's strengths compliment my weaknesses.

One decade is only the tip of the iceberg though. One decade could never be enough to spend with my beloved. I look forward to many more decades. I look forward to all the ups and downs, and storms left to come to us. I love the teenager I fell in love with, and I adore the man he has become.

I love everything he has done to provide for me and Joseph. I love the selfless courage he has to make a career out of such a dangerous field. He is so strong, and brave. I love seeing how far we've come, but I can't wait to see where our next road takes us.

Friday, June 18, 2010

Worried

So, I haven't really talked about this because I wanted to be sure about things before I brought it up. However, I am feeling a little anxious about it, and hope that writing about it will ease some of the worry.

Over the last month Joseph has been developing some bizarre symptoms. He has been drinking and urinating in excessive amounts. He also has been eating much more without putting on any weight. He's started having night sweats during the night and also during nap time. I recognized some of these symptoms as symptoms of diabetes, so I checked his blood sugar. It was nearly 200. The doctor didn't seem very worried and just told me so do a fasting blood sugar and see if that was more normal. So, I did that and it was pretty normal. However, the symptoms seem to be getting worse. The doctor said he could be getting ready to hit a growth spurt, but we should do some tests to double check things.

So, on Tuesday morning I took him to the hospital for several tests to rule out diabetes and anemia. I received a call back from them 2 days later, but my phone was in the car so I missed it. I knew that they don't usually call if everything is normal so I grew more and more worried as I waited for the office to reopen in the morning.

His tests all came back good except for one. He has a high number of ketones in his blood. The doctor said this could be from the fast or it may be something else. So, she ordered a 3 hour glucose tolerance test. We went and did that. It was a difficult and sad thing. Joseph had to have 4 separate blood draws in a 3 hour time span. My poor little boy was a trooper. I wish he hadn't had to go through this though.

So, now we await the results of the test. I am praying that it comes back normal. I know that juvenile diabetes is something that is very manageable now, but I still don't want him to live with something like that. I hope we hear back soon, so I can put this anxiety to rest.
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I wrote this to get it out of my system. I have since gotten the tests results, and his sugar levels were great. He still has a high amount of ketones in his blood, so the doctor wants to speak with a pediatric endocrinologist before deciding if we need to do anything else. She seems confident that everything is fine. I will update if I find anything else new out, but I'm hoping that the doc is right, and everything is just fine.